sometimes we fall and don’t understand why or how or how come, yet we get up and try, and just as you think you won’t make the same mistake again, you fall again.
But this second time has taught you the things you never learnt the first time.
I dwelled on you, being sad and upset and wondering, how come I lost my best friend.
But knowing what you do to me made me realize the damages you have on my soul.
Its the feeling of never being enough, of feeling that you are the root cause of misery when your heart was never set to be someone else misery.
Its within the ways you found comfort in me and suffocated me through it.
Its the fact that little voice in the back of my head that said “you’ll be good without it” that made me feel so guilty was actually true.
Sometimes it takes us two falls to understand why we lost a person in a specific part of our lives. Why they were there in specific chapters only and not so much forever. Its also knowing and understanding that some are only there for you for a certain chapter of your life, just like at moments in novels, where a character is there to teach you and lesson and go, some people are never meant to stay as the main characters in your novel, no, its just to give you a glimpse of the knowledge you need to know before you move on from this chapter of your life.
Knowledge by itself is power. Lessons are values. Memories will always be cherished, but somethings are never meant to last for a reason, and when you know the reason, every inch of you will want you to move on, look forward to the next chapter of your life without once looking back, because now you know, why it happened like it happened.
Sometimes, the second fall, heals you the most.